Friday, June 8, 2012

Bus Bully

If you remember a while back I was listing “firsts”.  Well now I’m going to fill you in on another one.

Back when the school year first started, there was a little issue with some other kid and Makenna on the bus.  This little child, who we’ll call “ B” (because her name starts with “B” not some derogatory reason…although it would fit,) started pinching and hitting Makenna.  When I asked Makenna why, “B” pinched her, she said, “I don’t know, she says she wants to rip my skin off.”  This was just the start of the disconcerting comments.

Time and again, we’d get snippets of “B” and her meanness towards Makenna.  We tried working with the bus driver in resolving the situation in various ways.  Until it all came to a head on January 24th.  As the bus pulled up to drop off Makenna, the bus driver called me over to tell me that there was an “incident” on the bus and that he was going to take further measures.

She got off the bus and was in tears.  As we walked up the driveway I asked Makenna what happened.  She replied, “B” says she wants to kill my dad!”  I was in shock and asked again.  Makenna went on, “B” says she wants to kill my dad!”  “Why does she want to do that?  Why did she say that?”  By this time she was in complete breakdown mode.  We had to call dad to prove he was alright.

How do you explain to your child that there’s something seriously wrong with “B’s” home life?  Then it was interesting as “B” then told Makenna that she wanted her dad (Makenna’s dad), to be her dad.  That just kind of confirmed that something was very wrong at that house.

The next day I called and talked with the principal.  I explained to him everything that had been going on since the beginning of the year.  He said he’d look in to it and call me back.

When he did call me back (the next day,) he said he looked at the bus tapes (ooh it makes it sound so federal like,) but couldn’t really tell anything from them.  He said that he talked to the bus driver and to others and found that Makenna is not the only child that is being harassed by “B.”  I’m not sure if this makes me feel any better. 

I had also told the principal that I thought that “B” was a pre-schooler and he did confirm that.  A four year old who has a mouth like a trucker, threatens to kill someone’s father and is just overall mean?  Yeah, I think she has a bad home life.

He had a talk with “B” and her parents (he may have said just her mother) and they were told that if her behavior didn’t change that she would have to find other transportation.  When Makenna came home I asked her how her ride home was and she said it was better.  But she did say that “B” did not apologize, like she was supposed to. 

We have since found out that Makenna was also a bit to blame as the bus driver would put her in one seat and she would then switch seats to sit with “B.”  We have told her repeatedly to stay where the bus driver puts her but she says she wants to be friends with “B.”  I had to explain to her that not everyone knows how to be a good friend.

I’d like to say all was resolved but there have been a few instances here and there but far less of them. 

I figure this whole situation will either make her more sensitive to bullying and more sympathetic and hopefully not become one or have the complete opposite effect and she’ll turn into one. 

Maybe she’ll forget the whole thing and life will go on.  

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