Last Thursday (March 31st), I decided to take Makenna to Barnes & Noble with me so that I could by her cousin Natalie a gift for her second birthday. NOT A GOOD IDEA.
First of all, my child typically wants to go somewhere every day after school. How do I know this? She repeatedly tells me when I pick her up, "Where are we going?" (my reply...home). Her answer in whining format, "No! I want to go somewhere!"
So today I figured, well at least I have some place to take her after school. When I told her that we weren't going home her reply (again in a whining format,) "I just want to go home." Figures. Not only that but she was of the mindset that I should take her home and she'd stay by herself while I went to the store. All the explanations of how I would be in deep trouble does not register with her.
Well, we got to B&N and I could not get her to leave. I don't blame anyone buy myself as I had a very strong feeling that this was going to be the case. Once she got to the kids section and saw the train set that it set up to play with I was done for.
I gave her the usually five-minute warning that we will be leaving but that didn't work. When the five minutes were up, I went over to get her and she had to do just one more thing, repeatedly. I finally said, "Enough...it's time to go!" So that started the downward spiral that lasted well into the night.
After telling her that if she did not listen she would lose Wii privileges she started coming but then insisted that I zip her coat. This is something that she can now do on her own but I agreed to.....while we were waiting in line. The kids section is in the back of the store and the line I was referring to was up front. Nope, that wasn't an acceptable answer to her.
I was bound and determined to get my way and she was bound and determined that I was not. So she fell to floor crying and whining about zipping her coat. I finally walked away and told her to follow....which she did not. I was in line at the front of the store and I could hear her all the way from the back. I got out of line, went up to her and told her that if she did not get up she was now losing TV time. This really sent her off.
I had to get her up off the floor, get her walking, while simultaneously telling her that she lost TV and Wii privileges (and any movies,) and telling her that I would zip up her coat in line. This just made her more mad and frustrated and she kept saying, "mom I just want to talk to you," or "mom, your not listening to me." I would reassure that I was listening to her and I would reiterate all the things she wanted to repeat to me over and over to show her I was listening.
I finally "won" and got up in line and zipped her coat but the hysterics continued. We finally left and I got her in the car (another big battle) and she was really mad. I don't even remember what she said but I started laughing. Then that made her mad and she said, "Don't laugh at me." I said I was laughing at what she said.
On the way home she was so mad she was yelling at me to turn off the radio to which I did NOT comply as I said the way she was asking me was completely inappropriate and I don't respond to that type of demand. She was really yelling, screaming and now kicking the seat (which was the passenger seat, luckily for her.) I put on my ear buds to my IPod and continued driving home.
She would occasionally yell my name to which I ignored and I told her that until she could calm down enough to talk rationally that I was not entertaining anything she had to say. She finally yelled, "Don't talk to me!" Needless to say at some point she fell asleep on the way home. Which I knew was the problem.
We got home and I was in Super-mommy mode of trying to defrost some chicken for dinner, clean a bathroom while that was happening and talk to a friend who called to chat long-distance. Makenna was barraging me with questions and I finally told her to go to her room and play with something. She complied and as I continued talking and cleaning I heard a SLAM of the door. This gave me great pause as I wondered if Chris came home early.
So then, as I continued talking, I went and looked out the window and saw my little independent, willful child walking down the steps. She had the audacity to leave the house without saying a word...and slamming the door on her way out!~
I quickly said to my friend, "I have to go my daughter just left the house." I ran downstairs and yelled out the door like the country hick I am, "Makenna! Get in here! What do you think you're doing?!?!" She nonchalantly replied, "I wanted to go outside."
I got her back inside and explained to her how she cannot just leave without saying something to me (or her dad if he was here.) I have to also add that a few times while shoveling snow a week or so ago, she'd take off and I'd find her walking down near the pond to which she got a huge scolding for. Her just leaving the house blew my mind. Plus, I have to add, I had the dogs to contend with making a mess in the house - so I was at my wits end.
Chris came home and we as a family had a discussion about what "listening to mommy" means and how complying is mandatory. Chris then went into this whole tiraid of how she embarrassed me in the store with her antics (and at the time he was saying this, I was thinking, I wasn't really embarrassed as I was too tired, just more frustrated). He then explained to her what embarrassed meant and she then blurted out, "Well mommy bare-assed me too." Once it registered in my tired brain what she had just said, I got up and left the table into the kitchen so as to not laugh at her again.
I guess some of this melt down could've been avoided if I had just agreed to zip up her coat at the spot she wanted but when you get two stubborn women and one has the power to wield their wishes more so over another...it's going to get ugly.